I believe all parents know…this awful moment when your child has an accident or a disease, this moment when your heart stops beating for a moment, when your mind goes crazy and you have all this awful pictures flashing before your inner eye, this moment of fear, this moment when you just have to function, when you have to accept whatever is and to remain calm in order to calm your child.
Accidents or diseases…no matter how big or small…are always reminders to check within, with our perception of live. What if? Do you live the life you have always dreamed off? Do you spend as much time as you wish, with your loved ones? What if? Would you have any regrets? Would you change something in your live? Yes? Then do it. Do it NOW. No excuses.
Yesterday, my little girl had an accident. She dropped her jaw on the tile floor. A second of shock and then lots of blood. Her lateral incisor sticked out in a very weird way and I was afraid her complete mandibular teeth were damaged.
What to do?
My first impulse was, we have to rush as soon as possible to the hospital. My girl heard me talking about going to the hospital and got even more upset. She was scared of getting a shot. I knew, first of all, I have to be calm myself, because our kids feel our emotions. I used a special technique, which always helps us.
I was holding her for a long time, telling her that we go through this together and that she is not alone and thanking our guardian angels for protecting us from worse. This is so important and helpful to keep in mind: Whatever happens to us, someone was there to protect us from worse.
I was not allowed to have a look, she covered her mouth with a washcloth and cried the whole time. Yes, it hurts so much and yes, you can cry as much as you want. No: “shhh, don’t cry baby. It does’t hurt. It is good already. Please don’t cry. shhh.” Allow to tell how it is.
Yes, I was afraid that she needs the ER, and I really wanted to see how bad it is. But I waited, half an hour more would’t hurt. She removed the cloth when she was ready and somehow she had managed to push the lateral incisor back to his place, well almost to his place. It is a bit wonky, but the rest of her teeth are in place. Gratitude.
Analysing your current situation
Are you happy with the life you live? If not, how fast can you change it? Now!
Since I left our “regular life” behind us, I spend as much time with my little girl as I want. The day after the accident I cancelled all appointments and we spend a lazy couch day. I am happy and proud of the life we create for us.
Healing on a different level
But….the same time I got upset about all the critics I have received so far. About the comments on how could I take my girl out of safety and wealth and put her to risk through travelling. One year on the road and then this accident happens in a safe and wealthy German Home.
Getting upset about stupids comments about my dengue fever. People who don’t care, but have lots of smart stuff to stay. Getting 10 cleft operations done didn’t cause half of the attention then my one week in hospital with dengue fever. What’s wrong with this world?
I felt so much anger about the critics who talked behind my back, about how could I fly to a friend and dare to have some off time after one year in service for others, assuming I would take donation money for this. Totally ignoring, that I used my private savings to get our charity work going, by putting everything we have including my heart and labour in it.
Getting upset at myself for giving so much thoughts to this negativ talking.
Getting upset at myself for expecting approval from people who live in a complete different comfort zone. Feeling sad about the realisation that accepting others as they are also might mean letting go of people you once felt very close to.
Life is constant change. All is well. Change might hurt sometimes. Change is part of the deal. We need to change to heal and grow.